Dear Blog
I'm not even sure why I've decided to keep this blog.
Not that I don't have things to say - there's lots and lots. It's just that so much has been happening lately that I don't really know where to start with it all. It's all top secret stuff too, which is why I'm putting it on the web. Seems like a pretty stupid thing to do, doesn't it - putting a whole lot of top secret stuff on the internet where anyone could find it, if they knew what they were looking for. But that's the key to it, really. No one does know. Dad doesn't even know which button to turn on to get the computer to work - he always has to ask me because he switches on the monitor and wonders why the screen stays blank. I used to try to explain it, but then I decided that maybe it was better that way. He thinks I'm some kind of genius when I boot it up for him and frankly, that suits me just fine. It's nice if at least one person in the world thinks you're a genius.
Mum is much better with computers but I hardly ever get to use it when I'm at her place so I doubt she even knows that I can use one. Feral Features is always on the one at her place, playing some stupid game where you pretend to be a lipstick or something, or chatting to her so-called boyfriends. I like telling her that they're all gross old men or really young kids but she claims that she's seen their photos and knows for a fact that they are teenagers and cute ones at that. I think I'd rather chat to gross old men, to be honest.
The only real threat is the kids at school, but this is why I'm using a pseudonym and I'm changing the names of people and places I mention. So if you happen to stumble across it and you know a teacher called Mrs Truelove who seems to do and say the kind of things the Mrs Truelove in my blog says don't go thinking you've worked it all out because you haven't. My teacher is called something totally different although it's a very ironic one, just like the fake one I've chosen. Mrs Truelove is an ironic name because I really, really hate her. I only discovered about irony a couple of years ago but it's a concept I can really relate to, especially as it's one that no one else around me does. Ironic, really.
I'm not even sure why I've decided to keep this blog.
Not that I don't have things to say - there's lots and lots. It's just that so much has been happening lately that I don't really know where to start with it all. It's all top secret stuff too, which is why I'm putting it on the web. Seems like a pretty stupid thing to do, doesn't it - putting a whole lot of top secret stuff on the internet where anyone could find it, if they knew what they were looking for. But that's the key to it, really. No one does know. Dad doesn't even know which button to turn on to get the computer to work - he always has to ask me because he switches on the monitor and wonders why the screen stays blank. I used to try to explain it, but then I decided that maybe it was better that way. He thinks I'm some kind of genius when I boot it up for him and frankly, that suits me just fine. It's nice if at least one person in the world thinks you're a genius.
Mum is much better with computers but I hardly ever get to use it when I'm at her place so I doubt she even knows that I can use one. Feral Features is always on the one at her place, playing some stupid game where you pretend to be a lipstick or something, or chatting to her so-called boyfriends. I like telling her that they're all gross old men or really young kids but she claims that she's seen their photos and knows for a fact that they are teenagers and cute ones at that. I think I'd rather chat to gross old men, to be honest.
The only real threat is the kids at school, but this is why I'm using a pseudonym and I'm changing the names of people and places I mention. So if you happen to stumble across it and you know a teacher called Mrs Truelove who seems to do and say the kind of things the Mrs Truelove in my blog says don't go thinking you've worked it all out because you haven't. My teacher is called something totally different although it's a very ironic one, just like the fake one I've chosen. Mrs Truelove is an ironic name because I really, really hate her. I only discovered about irony a couple of years ago but it's a concept I can really relate to, especially as it's one that no one else around me does. Ironic, really.
